Why Mediation Matters in Family Law and Why This Week Matters Too This week is Family Mediation Week, a good moment to talk about why mediation plays such an important role in family law. When families are going through separation or divorce, emotions often run high. Court can feel like the only option, but it’s rarely the easiest or most constructive path. Mediation offers a different way forward. One of the biggest benefits of mediation is control. Instead of handing decisions over to a judge who doesn’t know your family, mediation allows you to shape the outcome yourselves. With the support of a neutral mediator, you can talk through arrangements for children, finances, and property in a way that fits your real lives. Mediation can be quicker and far less expensive than going to court. Court proceedings can take months, sometimes years. Mediation can often resolve issues in a matter of weeks. That saves not only money, but stress. For parents, mediation can be especially valuable. It encourages cooperation and communication, which helps protect children from ongoing conflict. Agreements reached together are more likely to be followed, because both sides have had a say in the outcome. Family Mediation Vouchers worth £500 are still available to help fund the cost of family mediation. Confidentiality is another key advantage. Mediation discussions stay private, unlike court hearings, which can feel intrusive and exposing. Family Mediation Week is a reminder that there are calmer, more constructive ways to resolve family disputes. If you’re facing a family law issue, mediation may help you move forward with dignity, clarity, and less conflict. Contact the Family Law Team at Browell Smith & Co if you need advice and assistance.
Navigating Christmas After Separation: A Guide for Co-Parents Christmas is often touted as the “most wonderful time of the year,” but for separating parents, the festive season can become a stressful and contentious time when it comes to arrangements for children. The pressure to ensure that children have a joyful holiday experience can exacerbate tensions, leading to disputes over where the children will spend Christmas, how time should be divided, and how both parents can play an active role in creating holiday memories. Child arrangements and Christmas – What can I do? In order to avoid unnecessary conflict and ensure that children are not caught in the middle of parental disagreements, it is crucial for separating parents to have clear, amicable communication and a well-planned approach. Here are some essential tips, advice, and strategies to help separating parents navigate the Christmas season without straining their relationship or causing distress to their children. 1. Start Early and Plan Ahead Last-minute decisions and unclear expectations can create confusion and trigger conflicts. Begin discussing your Christmas arrangements as early as possible, ideally, before December. This allows both parents ample time to voice their preferences, work out a fair schedule, and avoid feeling rushed or pressured. If you have a parenting plan or a court order in place, review it and check the Christmas arrangements. Avoid leaving things to the last minute, as this can lead to misunderstandings or last-minute changes that frustrate both parents and children. 2. Communicate Openly and Respectfully Clear and respectful communication is key to avoiding disputes. Be honest about your plans and discuss any concerns you have with your ex-partner early on. If there are potential conflicts, address them calmly and with empathy, keeping the children’s needs at the forefront of the conversation. Make sure you are both clear about the agreed-upon schedule, including where the children will be spending time, who will be responsible for picking them up or dropping them off, and any special activities or traditions. If there are any changes or special circumstances that arise, be sure to communicate these as soon as possible. 3. Be Flexible and Open to Compromise Christmas is about fostering a positive experience for your children, and that may mean finding a middle ground on issues like time-sharing or where the children will spend certain days. Flexibility is key, and the ability to compromise is an important part of co-parenting. Be willing to adjust your own expectations and accommodate the other parent’s needs where possible, as long as it serves the best interests of the children. 4. Avoid Overloading Children with Too Much Travel or Change While it’s important to ensure both parents have quality time with the children, frequent transitions or too much back-and-forth can create additional stress for kids. Consider balancing your arrangements so that children are not constantly switching locations. This is especially important if the children are very young or if the distance between homes is significant. Try to build in some downtime for the children to relax, play, and enjoy the holiday season, rather than over-scheduling them with activities and travel. 5. Put the Children First Above all, remember that the primary goal is to ensure that your children have a happy and fulfilling Christmas. Keep in mind that their emotional needs may be different from yours, they will likely be feeling the stress of the holiday season and the changes in their family dynamic. 6. Consider Creating a Christmas Parenting Plan If you and your ex-partner find it difficult to agree on Christmas arrangements year after year, consider creating a written parenting plan. This can be part of your broader co-parenting agreement, or a separate document outlining specific arrangements for major holidays, including Christmas. The holiday plan should be as detailed as possible, covering: Which parent gets Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, or New Year’s Eve / Day Time frames for each parent’s holiday period (e.g., who has the children from the morning until the afternoon and vice versa) Plans for special events like gift-giving, family gatherings, pantomime, or church services A system for how to handle conflicts, emergencies, or unforeseen changes Having a solid plan in place in advance reduces the likelihood of misunderstandings and keeps the focus on the children’s happiness. 7. Don’t Use the Children as Messengers or Pawns As tempting as it may be to use your children to communicate your wishes or frustrations to your ex-partner, it’s critical to avoid putting them in a position where they feel like messengers or are being used to pass on negative information. It’s unfair to burden children with adult issues, and it can lead to confusion, guilt, and emotional stress. Keep your interactions with your ex-partner focused on the logistics of parenting, and avoid any behaviour that could make your children feel uncomfortable, forced to take sides, or caught in the middle of disagreements. 8. Manage Your Expectations The holiday season often brings with it a lot of pressure—both emotionally and logistically. When it comes to co-parenting during Christmas, it’s important to recognise that things may not go perfectly. There may be last-minute changes, unexpected issues, or moments when things don’t go according to plan. Managing your expectations means understanding that both parents are likely doing their best, and things may not always be as ideal as you hope. By keeping a flexible attitude and focusing on what matters—your children’s happiness—you can navigate potential conflicts more effectively. 9. Seek Legal Assistance if Needed In some cases, there may be a need for legal intervention, especially if there are unresolved conflicts or disputes regarding your children’s arrangements. If you and your ex-partner are unable to agree on holiday plans or one parent is refusing to cooperate, it may be wise to consult with a family lawyer or mediator who specialises in child arrangements. Contact our Family Law Department At Browell Smith & Co. we can help you to explore potential solutions and if necessary, assist with obtaining a court order to ensure that holiday arrangements are fair. The festive season is an opportunity to create special memories with your children, and that’s something both parents should be able to share in, regardless of any differences they may have. With early planning, open communication, and a willingness to compromise, separating parents can avoid common pitfalls and ensure that Christmas remains a time of joy and celebration for their children. Remember: the best interests of the children should always come first, and even though co-parenting through the holidays may present challenges, it is possible to work together and create a positive holiday experience for all involved.
Resolution Good Divorce Week 2025 This week is Good Divorce Week – a time to spotlight the need for better support for families going through separation. Right now, our family courts are overwhelmed. Delays are severe, resources are stretched, and families are often left in limbo during one of the most difficult times of their lives. As Resolution members, Our Family Law Team believe it doesn’t have to be this way. There is a ‘better way’ Divorce is never easy. There is a stereotype and stigma attached to it, and unless you’ve been through it yourself, your only experience may be through sensationalist TV dramas or films; or reading about the high-profile, multi-million pound cases in the news. Perhaps understandably, many see divorce as highly acrimonious, riddled with conflict and bitterness, with a devastating impact on children. But for many, the reality is very different. The truth is, court should be a last resort. There are alternative paths that can be less stressful, more affordable, and far less damaging – especially for children. For some couples, litigation may well be the only way for them to resolve their dispute, but far too many families going through separation end up in avoidable and acrimonious court proceedings. It doesn’t have to be like this – there is a ‘better way’. Guided by a Code that puts families first Resolution, an organisation made up of more than 6,500 family justice professionals, has members who are supporting people every day to find a better way. What sets Resolution members apart is our commitment to a Code of Practice, to support clients to resolve matters as constructively – and with as little conflict – as possible, keeping the best interests of children at the heart. Resolution’s Code of Practice sets out the principles of a non-confrontational approach to family matters, supporting our ethos and guiding how we work. Where it’s possible to do so, we seek to resolve problems outside of court, through a range of options, helping couples take more control over the process and enabling them to move on with their lives more quickly than through the courts. The Code isn’t just a set of ideals – it’s a practical, everyday guide for how we work with our peers, colleagues and our clients: We avoid inflammatory language We support and encourage families to put the best interests of children first We act with honesty, integrity and objectivity We help clients consider the long-term emotional and financial impact of their decisions We promote communication and collaboration wherever possible We use experience and knowledge to guide clients through the options available to them Supporting Good Divorce Week Good Divorce Week is about raising awareness of this approach – one that puts children first, reduces conflict, and encourages solutions that work for everyone involved. As Resolution members, we are proud to be part of a community that champions these values and advocates for change in our family justice system. Every family deserves the chance to find a better way through separation – one that’s constructive, compassionate, and fair. If you’re facing a separation or want to learn more about your options, at Browells, we’re here to help you take that first step.